(Hawkins & Fackrell, 2009)
There are different phases of development and divorce can have different effects on children depending on their age when the separation and divorce occurred.
Psychosocial and Cognitive Development & Divorce
based on the concepts from theorists, Erik Erikson and Jean Piaget
- In the stages of infancy, if both parents are available to the child, he or she is likely to prefer interaction with both as caregivers. They will form attachments in this phase. By the time a child is a toddler, they will have begun to show preferences to their primary caregivers. If both parents are frequently available to the child, it is likely that the child will develop a healthy attachment to both parents. If one of the parents is not seen for a long period of time, the parent will likely be forgotten, and relationships are unlikely to develop. According to Erikson, development of trust is built at this time. It is possible that if trust is not developed, the infant will develop some issues of mistrust (McLeod, 2013). Cognitively, Piaget refers to the forming healthy attachments as object permanency. The loss of these attachments could possibly cause depression and anxiety in the phases when children do not have any coping skills (McLeod, 2012).
- During early childhood, or about the age of two, a child is developing cognitively and physically, This is when they may use objects and symbols, and develop their use of language. Successfully completing these things will help a child develop direction and purpose. They also learn in this stage to feel responsible and guilty, so in theory a child experiencing divorce in this stage could face potential problems with internalizing fault and begin to develop poor self-esteem. Erikson refers to this stage as autonomy vs. shame and initiative vs. guilt (McLeod, 2013). This is also Piaget's pre-operational stage (McLeod, 2012). Childhood is an important phase in development because this is when they age they are learning to adapt, think logically, and make decisions. In Erikson's stage of industry vs. inferiority, and Piaget's stage of concrete operations, children are learning to understand things and make decisions at this phase in their life. The hope is that they begin to gain confidence. According to Erikson, they will either develop a sense of mastery and competence or feel inferior if they cannot acquire the socially accepted norm (McLeod, 2013). If a divorce occurs in this stage, a child may understand more issues about a divorce, could understand it, and accept it well. Some may attempt to control the situation by trying things to bring their parents back together, or feel responsible for the situation.
- Adolescence can be a difficult stage in a child's life regardless of external factors. This is typically when a child is in middle school and high school. In this phase of development, kids are faced with identity and identity confusion according to Erikson's theory (McLeod, 2013). This can be a time where an adolescent may be unsure about who they are or what they are supposed to be doing. They may often try many things in search of their own identity. In Piaget's stage of formal operations, these adolescents are now able to deal with higher level thinking and are also exploring their identity (McLeod, 2012). A divorce can interrupt impact the process of developing an identity. While in this phase, adolescents have a better chance at understanding the happenings of divorce, they are also somewhat more inclined to face pressures of assuming different roles in the family and other types of added pressures. (Summers, Forehand, Armistead, & Tannenbaum, 1998).
In each of these stages, it is important to find an equitable balance of successes and failures. It is important for the family to function as a unit and support the children throughout each of their transitions from infancy, to childhood and through adolescence.